By Gay Cousin Ted(dy), In no patricular order:
- I don’t think we should go to the Hop Leaf as it’s Midnight and we need to be on the road at 6am.
- I don’t care what your crazy theories are, Michigan is in the eastern standard time zone.
- Lunchables are not tailgating food.
- No, I don’t think the McDonalds appear “more friendly” here.
- Subsequently, I’m pretty sure the hash browns taste the same.
- No, we’re not stopping in Gary, Indiana to sightsee.
- Yes, we’re stopping in Kalamazoo, Michigan to sightsee.
- If me and Matt want to listen to the entire Britney Spears album you’re going to just have to shut the f up and deal with it.
- It would take to long to explain football to you, but I’m really glad we had this conversation.
- If Rachel happens to ask, Chicago is indeed closer to New Orleans than New York is. Though, I still think Abita beer tastes the same in either city.
- I still don’t understand relationship biscuits but the equivalent in my life might be a big bag of relationship sausages.
- I’ll say the word pussy as many damn times as I want to.
- We seem to fight a lot in Chicago and Queens but not as much in Brooklyn and Ann Arbor.
- Stop apologizing for eating the food at the tailgate we were invited to.
- Please don’t walk into church and say “even the churches in chicago are nicer.”
- When people come to you to shake your hand during the sign of peace, please don’t start crying.
- Did you just perform cunnilingus on the jam?
- No, you can’t have anymore jam.
- Brick House Pizza is different than Chicago Deep Dish Pizza
- Don’t ever ask ask me to not repeat a Jason Mraz song. Ever.
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